salam.
dah bukak Terfaktab? the new post agak dekat dgn diri,
The Cycle of Broken Hearted
dekat dengan kisah galah, sangat dekat.
well, we started out as friend, like any other couple, well, how we met is unusual haha (': ahhh memories
then we moved out to be a couple, the best three months of my life, until now i still thinks those three months are precious
then, things started to fall apart, he left me, we broke up, and everything seems gone wrong for me, i was so broken tht i rebounded at least with 4-5 guys )': it's bad, its so so bad, this only stop on march 2010 )': well, i was so down and feeling useless bcs he's my first ( ok D was the first, but ignore tht ) and he left me for another girl, it just kinda break me
it hurts, almost a year of those, in between, both of us are fighting to show we're much better off without each other, it hurts to see his new gf segebu gebu alam -.- while my new boyf well, let just say to be honest, i could do much better, they're all jerks bcs they dont know how to respect woman, they only know what the best for them, so yeah they're jerks
i still remember, it's raya 2009, we were screaming at each other just before raya breaks, and i was supposed to be in class, but i was outside screaming my heart out at him, )': i just cant beat watching him hugging other girl, or just take pic with other girl, i feel like killing both of 'em
then, for year since tht, i stopped caring about him, stop thinking about him, i was a bit wild at tht time, to be honest, i was going here and there with one boyf after the next, oh yeah i'm opening all jz bcs i want to, i kept it to myself and has been eating me inside, and honestly we done things tht until now, i cried when i think of it, it's shameful it's stupid and i wish i hadn't done it, it's just stupid
the if you refer to the blogpost again, The Cycle of Broken Hearted, the last stage is Kembali Berkawan, it's october 2010 if im not mistaken when we met again, the first time after june 2009, so it's an awkward meeting, not much talking, just a lot of walking and mumbling to one another, and then comes the next date, and the next, and the next, we become suprisingly good friends, and i cant help wondering sometimes if we're gonne hook up again someday or just spending time with each other to fill the boredom hmm i really get me thinking honestly (:
as i said, both of us hinted about getting back together every single time we went out, but the date ends with some sort of disagreement, like the last date, he practically emptied my gas -.- well, thank you. he's like my baby brother, too cute, too manja, too childish, now tht i think of it, we're better off as friends sbb bila berkawan, there's no limit, but bila ada cop couple kt dahi, everything has limit, how to behave, how to react to a statement, like when he always commenting how fat i am, or he kept calling me "orang tua" -.- klu couple dah confrim perang dunia, since masa couple dulu, dia sangat menjaga adab, but now he just plain rude sometimes, well macam member kan?
i dont feel dupdapdupdap around him like before, and my philosophy apparently if a guy can give me tht dupdapdupdap when he's around me, well, tht means i want him, i like him and the likes.
but around MM, i do feel dupdapdupdap. which makes me go crazy. i dont hate him for what he had done, he has the right. it just breaks me he gave hope and then just let it hanging like tht, and let me watch him cruising aroud with one girl after the next, well, let just assumed he's the DAHLIA PLAYER. ok.
and for inche faizulafiff, he's the only one, and i meant this, the only one tht can make me teary, or cry just by raising his voice. even if it is unintentional. or sometimes i get emotional just by his words, menusuk sangat, he's been good boy lately, but i know he dont trust me anymore, he just said he did, but when we have another fight like the one we have the night before my two papers, there he goes not trusting me. homai.. if he only knew, sayang sangat kat dia, but i guess things will be better if i let go each and everyone of them.
if only.
)': ahhh i hate this post. i hate it.
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